Tag Archives: Writer

Time to Write Your Own Reality Check, Dear Storyteller.

13 Feb

Following someone else “Writing-Routine” isn’t going to magically fill the gaps in the story or book you’re writing.

Your experiences is what color your novel, and there’s a guarantee that no one in the world will understand your story better than you.

The answers to your problems, why it might seem unbearable to write because your writer’s block is so horrible, is in yourself.

You know what you’re going through.

If you’re anything like me, you’re great at giving other people advice. Your passion seems to be catching, and you have the habit of accidentally inspiring friends to take action while you’re talking of your own dreams. You seem to be able to inspire them, that it seems they are ruthlessly pursuing their passions. You seem to be able to talk down their dreams, to earth, to the possible plane.

You start to wonder, if you’re able to inspire people so well, to solve their own problems of self-esteem, or their “can’t-do-attitudes” why the hell are you so listless? Why are you so little motivated to move the mountains required to conquer your own dreams?

It’s you.

It’s your problem. Maybe it’s a fear of success, maybe it’s the fear or rejection, maybe it’s not fear at all, but your own complacency of failure. Instead of psychoanalyzing the people around you, seeing into their souls to see their problems… maybe it’s time for a little self-reflection.

After all, you’re the only person in the world who you can be sure is actually being honest with you, which makes great character fodder.

Look to yourself, Find out your fears, your creative blocks, and what you believe you can actually achieve and move from there.

As a writer, as a creator of worlds, you literally can shape mountains if you so please, so why in the hell are you not writing? Why in the hell can’t you finish that book? Why in the hell are you worrying so much about what happens after the book is completed rather than writing the book.

You’re a dreamer, all good storytellers are… I’m not saying deny your nature. Harvest it. If you can dream of the rewards of being an wonderfully illustrious writer… you can certainly dream up a book, with conflict, character motivation, and either a resolution or new beginning for an end.

You became, or decided you were a writer for a reason.

Maybe it was because you always enjoyed reading or being told stories as a little kid… maybe you found the nature of self-reflection calming. Maybe you wrote because you had to. It was a way to escape your little reality, and now you want to share it with the world.

Whatever your original reason was, you’ve certainly forgotten it. If you’re still looking at “successful” writers to solve your problems.

Figure it out, the you that you were, is most certainly apart of the you that you are now. The you that is having problems finding the passion, most certainly can take a page out of the book of the former you that wrote for hours, tirelessly.

Introduce the Passionate You, and the slightly-bitter-having-problems-finding-that-fire You, and let them affect each other. Let the one with their boots planted firm into the ground, reach and connect with the one in the clouds, and together allow them to make your story, the reason why you started writing, the story that you have been born to tell, rain down upon the world.

It’s that simple.

You’ve lost passion, right? Find it. You’re lost in your own story? Give yourself directions. You’re having problems with ending your story? End it, all good things come to an end, and I guarantee, that your story that’s changed you over the course of writing is good enough. Some things aren’t meant to be resolved and that’s the nature of the beast. Put a bandaid over it, and carry on.

Link

Turning My Back on the Writer’s Technological Revolution

18 May

I’m a writer. I’ve been seriously pursuing a writing career for 10 years, since I was 10. Since I was a little precocious girl, I’ve been doing research for my future career, which has led me to following the change from physically writing things out to digital.

Since I started writing at 4, I was doing research starting 1996, which meant just early enough to see the rise of computers, and the beginning of people outside of business men, carrying around laptops.

In the past, I’ve used, when writing, many well-thought out, and good programs:  ywriter5, Scrivener, q10 and many others.

I’ve enjoyed them, I’ve enjoyed the organization that they’ve brought to my notes, the weird motivation that having a timer and goal obvious in your word processor gives, and I sincerely believed that I was going to successfully finish my books in them.

I’ve believed and trusted in all of these programs created by writers, or for writers, that they would provide me the tools that were necessary to write.

But I’ve realized something, I don’t need any of these fancy tools to write, most especially if I’m writing wireless (that’s without the laptop, but with the all purpose pen and paper). I’m going wireless, only second drafts will ever reach the computer.

I’m not saying that writing digitally has stopped me from successful writing well, I’m just saying, I think that lately it’s been hampering my development toward plot work, well-rounded characters and getting things done.

I’ve tried every single type of digital writing that you can use, and for the developer’s of these programs I have the utmost respect, but, there is no good way to plot, plan, outline, or organize in the digital format.

I’ve finally seen the light and realized why I’m having such trouble finishing my stories, unlike I did when when I was younger and writing away in my notebooks.

The problem with doing things on the computer, is that there is a limit to what you can do on it. You are bound, when planning by the width of the screen, by the terribleness of trying to draw diagrams in paint (which I’m actually really good at), of not being able to rip apart pieces of paper and past them back on, and whether or not you have a power source, eventually. And even with Microsoft Word/Open Office’s track changes format, it’s a poor substitute for writing in the margins, crossing things out angrily, and drawing arrows when editing to move entire chunks to different sections of the book.

I’m going wireless, save for blogging, for my writing of first drafts from now on.

Forget about all of the advice I’ve been reading, hearing and following. I truly believe that the only way to get stuff down, most especially when plotting things out, is to write it all down, and have the freedom to draw obnoxious diagrams that remind you of things, or helps you keep the tension up.

Truly,♥Aspiringtobesomeone

Procrastinations lost it’s fun and I’m effing breaking.

28 Oct

Yes the title is definitely a reference to Green Day’s Longview… but I swear that isn’t the point of this post…. The point is mostly Nanowrimo.


Nano09

(F.Y.I: If you click on the icon above it will link you to the nanowrimo website where you can sign up.)

I signed up for nanowrimo, yet again. Nanowrimo is National Novel Writing Month, it happens from Nov. 1st to Nov. 30th, the point being is to complete a 50,000 word novel in 30 days. Roughly 1,667 words a day.

Doesn’t sound that hard does it? It is though. At least to write a comprehensible story with a plot that makes sense. A lot of people bash on this contest because it’s ‘quantity over quality’… though I’m sure that some of the users embrace this philosophy… I write quality 100%. (However, I’ve never won… mostly because a lot of things happen in November that are preventing… family reunions, family birthdays, parties and other events).

The thing is, Nanowrimo is used as a motivator. It promotes literature, goal-making, decisiveness, and other fundamental skills that people need to learn over the length of their life… and you can learn basically any skill you will need to use in the future in this 30-day self-contest.

You make this contest what you will… it can be as serious or as flighty as you want.

Also, because Nanowrimo is part of a non-profit organization, Createspace.com is quite generously allowing the verified winners of Nanowrimo to publish a copy of their manuscript, completly bound with a custom cover and the whole bit… So you gotta say, you’d love to have your name in print… even if it is one copy… though, think about what a collectors’ item it could be after you’ve made your literary career.

If you have the money, and like this cause you should really consider donating to the Office of Letters and Light, because they bring this program to schools across the country… promoting not only writing, but reading, and literary competency.

But anyways, that aside… I have no idea what I’m doing for Nanowrmo 09, and am going to be VERY busy during the beginning of it… I’ll be staying after school and do more out of school stuff then I’ve ever have…

Good Luck to all!
Truly,
♥Aspiringtobesomeone

Back from the dead and better for it!

4 Aug

So the past few days have been horrendously stressful compared to what was before.

There’s a really good reason. I hadn’t backed up my novel on my computer since the 13,000 word mark and the computer crashed. (which has happened to me before… the only difference being… I was only like 3,000 words into it. So I really knew to back it up…. but I didn’t it).

To be frank, I was depressed…. all those 8 months of work… when I felt like I wasn’t just wasting my life was gone. Which actually meant I did waste all that time. My Dad felt really bad about… mostly I think because I came into his room tears streaming down my face and asked him where the set-up disk was… hoping I could boot safe mode from disk.

We’ve been having an effing-crazy virus that would pop up every 20 minutes and say that we had a virus and that we needed to take care of that… I’ve found random programs that have weeded their way into our system and hunted down every single one of them and rid ourselves of them. I couldn’t find this one… my dad believes it was in the browsing history… that my younger sister didn’t even know you were supposed to clear out…

Surprisingly enough, our computer didn’t die because of viruses…. it died because the harddrive was full… and couldn’t run because of it. The harddrive was full because my family has recently started using hulu a lot. Hulu saves the entire movie to your harddrive somewhere…. my little sister had been watching the O.C. for a couple days then… I think she was on the second season when it happened… we only have a 40 GB harddrive in the laptop… which is pretty good considering that it’s like 10 years old. I was never worried about it overfilling mostly because our main computer was a 20 GB for a couple years and we had never filled it.

But anyways… the sucker would not even load up safe mode…. and I admit I cried at the lost of basically my whole novel and the 8 months wasted.

My dad, who used to fix computers as a living started in on it. I didn’t watch because I didn’t want get my hopes up or put pressure on him…. I believe he must have worked on it for at least 4 hours… the poor guy… seemed like he wasting all of his time… until linux started up. Through Linux (which will run by C.D.) we were able to access all of the files and back them up. 

My Book was an astounding 119 kb in a .txt file which my Dad said was the biggest he’d seen and was really worried that it was too big to have the computer extract it. But it worked out! The Novel is now on a flash drive and on my Dad’s other computer.

I almost think that this whole thing… thinking the book was gone for 2 days was meant to motivate me this whole time….. Can I just say that I’m so glad that I didn’t blog about this while I was in Mourning for my book?

My Dad literally is a witch doctor of computers…. he did crazy voodoo and resurrected a surly dead laptop. I had never witnessed him fixing a computer first hand… especially when it was so important to the person that wanted it fixed.

Well, I’m over and out! Good luck, Good weather and Good Day
♥Aspiringtobesomeone

Crazy Aspirations are a Waste of Time.

20 Jul

It’s the 48th day of summer. Not that I’m counting (I’m really not… I was curious how much time I’ve wasted). That’s just it. It’s the summer before my senior year, and this is probably the last shot I have at completely wasting my time on stupid things. However, I don’t really want to waste my time… I feel like I should be doing something… Well I know what I feel like I should be doing…

I should be writing.. not “Blog-writing” I should be working on my book. Honestly, it’s a book that’s been in planning before Stephanie Meyer even got published. I’ve always wanted to write a vampire book… I was a horror fan, before I ever heard my first ghost story… I was in love with the genre before even hearing the proper term. I was looking for the unabridged version of Bram Stoker’s Dracula, since 6th grade.. when I was finally able to find one, I stayed up until four A.M. reading it (even though I had school in the morning and had to wake up at 5:30 am to be on time) I reread it until I had to return it. I felt like I could honestly say I was a horror fan after.

Naturally when I decided I want to be a writer, I want to contribute to my favorite genre, in specific, vampires. I know there’s tons of vampire books out there… especially ones that were written after twilight.

I personally don’t like twilight. I am biased, I admit it. Mostly, because I am a horror fan, and do not like a romance novel being considered horror.  I realize that vampires are freakishly trendy right now and I want to avoid being thrust into the crowd.. I believe that my take on vampires is as original as Anne Rice’s.

I refuse to compare myself to twilight… mostly because it isn’t original… anybody who’s read the Vampire Chronicles has to be admit the freakish similarities going all the way down to names… Maybe Stephanie Meyer didn’t write the Twilight Books without reading any vampire fiction before… who knows? But my book, cannot even be submitted (without being compared to Twilight) until 10 years later (at least, considering the movies will keep it alive longer no doubt.) So, I’m writing a book that literally can’t be seen until much later and I admit I have no motivation right now in finishing it.

I love the characters… I love writing it. But I feel like I’m doing a whole bunch of short stories that involve the same people.

I want to start something different. If it goes well I might give it a category in this blog and you can just read it here. and maybe I’ll feel better about things know that something of mine is out there, being seen and read….My idea, isn’t what ‘sells’ (meaning: it appeals  to a very limited audience). I don’t know I’m just babbling.

My dad is bummed out, I know he feels like he’s not getting anywhere in his life… because all that’s happening is he goes to work, comes home, maybe watches tv for a while and goes to sleep. I feel bad for it, I know he’s getting frustrated and there’s nothing that I can do. I’m cleaning out the fridge today, maybe doing the dishes… making sure the house is clean for him. It’s basically all that I can do. I feel like taking him out for a movie… or maybe we’ll all go camping like he said he wanted to this summer.

I’m just worried. When he wasn’t getting satisfaction out of his life… he turned to strange woman to get it. (Not saying that my Dad had affairs or anything… he’s happily divorced) I mean, he dumped this lady that was stalking him (Finally!) and three months later he tells us he’s engaged to her. They actually got married and she trapped him into a relationship by cohorted all his money and finally he saves up just enough to move out again and begins to be happy in his freedom… he even treated us better (not that you could really improve much on how he treats us).

But now, he’s starting to chill out with his ex-wife almost every night and I can’t help but be afraid that he’ll go back to her. Not only did she treat us like crap but she used my Dad and treated him like dirt. It’s not healthly for him. I just want him to be happy and let him feel satisfied. I feel bad for venting on all you people… but I just can’t not think about it.

He’s really worried about his retirement because my birthmother (who is remarried and honestly I think owes my Dad a buttload considering that she got the house and all of the possessions that were worth something) gets half of it. If it weren’t for her, he’d be able to retire at 55.  Now he’s worrying that he’s going to need to work until the day he dies. I always tell him, he’ll always be welcome at my house (of the future, considering that I’m 17.) He always says that once I get a guy and have kids, I won’t want him there. Honestly, I don’t plan on getting married. I don’t want to have kids myself… right now if there’s any kids in my future… I’ll take orphans or kids that were abused… who are older and potty-trained and need someone to guide them… that understands what it’s like to be abused. That’s it.

I would be fine with my Dad in any setting anyways. I think he’s refusing himself to take it from any of us because he feels like it’s a handout. I don’t see it as a handout. I owe him more than you could owe anybody. He gave up his life to raise some kids he didn’t even know. (My birthmother forced him to work two full-time jobs where he could only be at home for 4 hours and that was reserved for sleep… believe me… I saw it. Basically until I was 10. I’m the fourth out of six… so my older siblings were 17, 15, and 13… about the time that childhood evaporates.) He’s in a dead-end job that’s so specialized that basically no other industry will take him… he’s tried. The government is slowly liquidating his job… and who knows what’ll happen than. He has some college education but he went college 30 years ago.

Who can blame the guy for having a bleak outlook? I want to help him out. I want to calm his fears… and just let him relax or party if he feels like it.

My Dad is one of the sweetest guys you’ll ever know… he’ll help out anybody…even if it feels like it’s going to take out a chuck of his only possessions in this world. I mean the guy will be running late to a wedding, or baby blessing or whatever… and he’ll stop on the highway for whoever’s car didn’t seem to work out today. He’ll give strangers rides… he’ll talk to someone who’s headlight went out and follow them home (if they want it) just so they can make it home okay.

My Dad is the prime example of what people should be striving for. He is perfectly supportive of everything we do. He genuinely hurts when people around him are hurting. I remember one time he bought a candybar (A little sneaking around for the guilty pleasure of having chocolate) saw me and broke it in half and when I refused saying that he needs to let him have his own stuff and that he shares too excessively (which is true… almost every penny of his paycheck goes to the wellbeing of others… house payment included) and he replied, “I’m a father. I’m supposed to be a provider… sharing is my job.” That’s the attitude he has about everything! Anybody could learn something about kindness by watching my Dad. I’m not saying that my dad is perfect or holy or anything.. (to be frank his obsession with model airplanes, cars, and robots is a bit excessive). He’s just a good man. A very rare type of man, nowadays.

I just don’t know what else I can do for him.

I mean I pride myself on my ability to help others, as my Dad does… and what does it mean when I can’t even help my own father? I feel like I can’t do anything. I just want the people around me happy… than I’ll be happy.

Which is my problem… my happiness depends on the happiness of others around me… I’m perfectly willing to conform into whatever they need me to be. That’s what it means for me when I say, “Aspiring to be someone.” I am noone. I have no likes, or dislikes… I have no personality except the one the people need who’re around me. I’m literally just learning who I am myself. I want the ability to know myself, and to be selfish with things (besides the occasional candybar) I want to see how it feels to live life normally… (like how other people do… instead of literally trying to please everyone).

I don’t know… it’s been a couple of crazy days… I don’t know what I’m saying or what I’m feeling… but thank you for tuning in, and allowing me to vent.

Yours Truly,
-Aspiringtobesomeone